When They Aren’t So Little Anymore


My oldest turned 9 over the weekend. How is that even possible? How was I first pregnant almost a decade ago?! It seriously seems like it was just yesterday. Birthdays have become such a weird thing for me. I’m not sure if it has to do with getting older and also watching my babies get older, or if it has to do with losing a child and never getting to celebrate birthdays with her. I have always wanted my kids birthdays to be special, I think every mom does. But, now I want them to be memorable as well. I also want to take in and remember everything that happens, every single detail. I would say I’ve become sappy in my recent years but instead I will say I am finding joy in moments I would once think ordinary. We spent Layla’s birthday on Friday doing what she wanted to do, like we do all of the kids birthdays. We ate breakfast at Toast, saw Sherlock Gnomes at the movie theater, went to Cherry Berry, and made lasagna with her for dinner. She celebrated her birthday with her friends on Sunday roller skating, eating at Osaka, and ended the day with her cake I made for her.  PNLTE4911I used to always make my children’s birthday cakes. When they were younger they usually wanted cupcakes. I have made minion cupcakes, ninja turtle cupcakes, hot pink glittery cupcakes, stormtrooper cupcakes and the list goes on. Then I got busy, life got busy and somewhere along the way I stopped making them, and started buying them. Not that there is anything wrong with that. I can’t make an ice cream cake, or a two tiered unicorn cake and thats ok. But this year Logan asked me to make his cake instead of buying him one and so I did. Then Layla asked me if I would make her cake this year as well, and I gladly did. Are my cakes as beautiful as cakes you could buy? Absolutely not! I am not a very good baker in general and I have no training in cake decorating, but that doesnt matter. My kids love them, and more importantly they feel special when I make their cake exactly how they want. They love watching me bake them, watching it all put together, and most of all love watching them be decorated. That makes all the time it takes worth it for me. The look on their faces, their smiles, and seeing them feel special. I hope they can remember these little things, and how much their momma loves them. So, with my oldest being so old in what seems like an instant, hold your little ones tighter and longer today because I promise the next time you turn around they won’t be so little anymore.


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